My Path to Getting Rich

This is my blog about my journey to financial freedom.

Friday, June 13, 2008

Sisyphean Challenge


Ever feel as though you aren’t getting anywhere and paying into that debt and it isn’t going anywhere? Do you feel as though you are never going to get out of the bondage of debt that gives you sleepless nights on how you are going to pay for groceries tomorrow? Times are definitely tough with high gas prices and the temptation to use credit sounds as an easy way to get by, but you must resist. You must stay focused on paying down those debts with any available funds you have. You might say, “Money is tight, and I don’t have extra for that!” but this attitude will only dig you deeper down and cost you big bucks if you don’t do this now. Find the money. Disconnect that cable, get a second job and skip out on that Starbucks coffee every morning. I know it seems tough but if you don’t get it under control, you will only be rolling that boulder uphill only to have it roll right back to the bottom.


Sisyphus was a King in Greek mythology that was punished for his deceitful acts towards Zeus and others. His punishment was to roll a huge boulder up a very steep hill only to watch it roll back to the bottom and forced to do it all over again for eternity. Can you imagine the frustration?


When you are trying to eliminate debt, sometimes it can feel like that boulder is getting bigger and heavier with every trip up . There are times when those balances just don’t seem to be lowering. Stick to it and keep your eye on the prize of financial freedom. The good news is that your days of pushing a boulder don’t have to be an eternity. The choice is yours on how many trips up you will make to the top. Keep in mind that one day you will push it up and over for the last time, then you will look down and celebrate a victory which very few will ever achieve.

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10 Comments:

Blogger stardor said...

Hello Francisco, its me Christopher lee. I like what I read on here, and about a month ago I would have completely agreed with you. I know every situation is different. But I thought I would share something with you that I learned.

The most important thing I have learned as of late is that being financially successful does not by any means equate to happiness, and in fact focusing on financial ambitions can make you very depressed and unhappy.

Me and my wife were trying to live the ideal model of being financially successful and building on a rich financial future, and I was completely blind to the actual whole I was digging myself into.

So being the way I have been for awhile I was all about paying the bills down, no extra spending, and most importantly making it through a very grueling schedule of full time work full time school and collecting the GI bill so that we had no debt and financial success and a good chance for a really decent job. Trouble is me and Melissa had no idea what kind of stress and strain this puts on us individually and as a couple.

What that lifestyle equated to is me and Melissa spending no or little time together, being stingy with money to the point were I denied our own needs that have monetary value and keep our mental status healthy. There were no trips just the two of us. No eating out. NOt much getting out of the house. It was all work and study and five hours of sleep. And all I could think about is, yea in two years we will be financially ready and able for kids and a house and we will be living a proper life financially.I was trying my best to have a text book success story. But month after month things just took a turn for the worst.

By the end of the first year of neglecting our happiness to try and ensure we were financially stable our marraige started to fall apart. Gone were the days of buying that starbucks in the morning and having our morning chats. Taking long road trips and spending time together. Everything was work, and most of the things we were doing were all simply to get out of about 9 grand in debt and so that we both would have decent paying jobs and be able to then have kids, to which we would be around 29 or so when we got around to that.

By worrying about financial success so much I and her began to let the big picture slip, we both began to ignore what makes us happy. We both were using the excuse of, oh well in two years we will be happier then ever. But after reading many many real true stories on the internet I have come to one conclusion. This is a good way to let an awesome marriage slip through your fingers.

My thoughts of what made us happy began to shift. I began to think about what I really want in life. I realized what I really wanted is a happy marriage and a few kids. I began to realize that more then being financially secure I love to spend time with my wife, and I felt that by waiting to be financially stable enough to have kids was going to put us at a great risk of not having kids at all.

I realized that we are still young and that when we do have kids our time together will even be shorter. I realized that in America Debt isnt something you have to be stressed out about. Really its the key to financial success, as you need to build strong credit.
So in the last month or so me and the wife have concentrated on spending time together, which means spending a lot of money on us. Now when I say that, I am not talking about clothes and jewelry. I am talking about weekend trips to Seattle, doing romantic getaways. Just walking around places unfamiliar and talking. Staying here and there in hotels away from home. Going out to that nice restearaunt to relax. Enjoying the drinks and foods that we like to eat in moderation. Things started to change instantly. I realized that being stingy with money to being financially succesful is only good to a certain point. I realized that you still need that time away trying new things, which usually costs more money. Not in a sense that we have to go and spend a lot of money. But I started to think, hey this full time job at night and going to school during the day. Were does that leave me and Melissa? Were is our time together? Her and me going to school at the same time and her having a full time job, were does that leave us? I quickly became apparent that we were killing ourselvs for nothing. For a bit more financial success, that really does not matter. Really I think on our current path we would have been setting ourselvs up for divorce.

So we have restructured our lives. We have decided that she is going to get her generals done, and then quit school while we try for a child before it might be to late. We have decided to go out for the rest of the summer and spend us time and reconnect, go places and do things together. Try new things. We have decided to move closer to her home so we have more family support, so we have people to guide us and be there for us that we can truly rely on. The place I live in is paradise, but its also what you make it. Sure its really nice here, but really we have no family here.

You see our minds were focused on financial gain to get that few extra dollars, and we discovered it was not worth it. I think when you do things like deny yourself that starbucks coffee in the morning that costs five bucks, that you are denying yourself a small token that might set the mood for your day. When you set a rough schedule of paying of bills and rigorous work, its easy to forget about building upon a relationship and you can find yourself rationalizing that financial success can bring this back, but from what I have read, it usually does not.

I was ultimately trying to model myself after people like Sean Combs and donald trump. I was fascinated with there drive, and there success, I wanted that, and I was willing to work hard for that. But one thing I did not see is what about there personal lifes. Its easy to see that both of there personal lifes suck. Donald has a trophy wife, and Diddy has been remarried twice. They leave no time for relationships, because to ultimately become that financially successful and be that driven those things in life come second to them. And really its the small things that make a man happy. I would rather go to Seattle spend a few bucks on a hotel lay out under the space needle and then for the rest of my life remember that talk we had. Or take the day off of work just the to of us, say fuck the overtime and strenuous schedule for a few extra dollars and just sit at home cuddle and watch a movie. Yea I spent money on that movie, and I am not getting that double time and half overtime, but you know what Id rather have that time with her discussing our future, thinking about kids, hanging out with her. Because that is truly what makes me happy is the great times we share together.

It sucks that I got this far in to realize this. I have also realize that you cant make your own luck. And sometimes it feels right to let the chips fall were they may. I decided to take a gamble and have kids now. Hell I will be out of school in a year. I am ambitious Ill have the job 9-5 making decent money. Living comftorably, having time for Melissa and our child. And you know what, I thought this change would instill fear and uncertainty. But my fear and uncertainty went away. It feel so right. I know you can sense my anger here. I am angry at myself, that I let this happen to our wonderful relationship. I am just glad that I decided there was a problem and decided to fix it and am glad that the spark in our relationship is back and in full swing. Suddenly this last month I am truely happy. And honestly I have not been this happy since I just got out of the military. From the day I started trying to plan our lives and create my own luck and financial gain like it seems you have set out to do, I have become more and more unhappy with myself and with life. I found myself working harder and harder because of this, and that is something that I also learned. I think "that" is were people like trump, and your wall street warriors get there drive. That fear of not being financially secure enough drives them to work harder and harder, and in that they gradually like I was forget about the real important things.

I realize that a lot of people would say, well you have to sacrifice and that you are giving up, because its only two years then after that you can afford a lot more and all that. But this is unrealistic, because doing that for two years, it will not stop, there will allways be something financially that is not stable. That fear and that drive will just get busier. That and two years of something like is a long time to put away being happy and in a good relationship with the wife. It could very well end the marraige. So I realize that yes it will take me a bit longer to get to were I envisioned us in two years, but I feel secure that our relationship and love for each other will still be there, and I realized that no matter how hard I work money is never guaranteed. I do not think relationships are like that. I think if you truly work hard at keeping each other happy and interested in each other you have a lot more stable of an investment then playing the get rich game.

I know you and Anna probably have a entirely different situation. Really writing this has been therapy for me, and I felt it was the proper place. I have not spoken to you in awhile and value your friendship. I hope all is well and I hope to hear from you soon.

August 14, 2008 at 1:04 PM  
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January 15, 2010 at 2:06 PM  
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Now, I feel good, I begin to get real income.
It's all about how to choose a proper companion who uses your money in a right way - that is incorporate it in real deals, and shares the profit with me.

You can ask, if there are such firms? I'm obliged to answer the truth, YES, there are. Please get to know about one of them:
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